Douche Bag...And A Little Bit More

After catching Sharon Reed on Late Night with David Letterman, I knew there was something I didn't like about her. As it turns out, there's tons not to like about this skank.

On the petty side, she did the entire interview in one of those corny, irritating TV news reporter voices, and seemed to be auditioning for a porno, stroking herself and going all LL Cool J-like with the lip licking and the F-me eyes.

During her audition/interview, Reed claimed that stripping on TV was "about art." The story, about flabby naked people who like to pose en masse with similarly flabby naked people, was shot this summer, but aired just a few weeks ago during sweeps, which I guess is the only time they could show a report "about art."

Before the clock started on her 15 minutes of shame, Reed had already demonstrated her Diana Ross-like people skills at numerous other news stations. As an anchor in Philadelphia, she was called in to a Philly Police Station after posting nasty little comments about a fellow reporter online. She was fired.

And Reed has the gold-digging ho market covered, nailing Philly Eagle Donovan McNabb and Philly Sixer Aaron McKie, which explains how she got these. She was also the 435th black girl nailed by Robert Deniro.

Obviously, being the Channel 19 investigative hootchie is beneath Reed. The Omerosa of eyewitness news, she's bound to piss off enough people and screw enough celebs to land her dream job: fondling her plastic chest on the pages of Playboy or landing the role as Hooker #2 on a Cinemax late movie. Wanting to be a porn star is ambitious and generous. Like DeNiro, any Nubian princess who wants to flash her boobies is ok by me. But it ain't "about art," douche bag.